You Make the Choice

My mind reels at the notion that there is only one path in any situation. That you would have to say yes, stay the course, keep on keepin’ on.


But when we’re used to something, in a rut, doing what is expected, feeling obligated, familiar, comfortable, lazy even, we stop thinking big. We begin to block all of our options because our panoramic view contracts to a pinhole so small it can grip only one course of action.


You could: order takeout, sleep in, miss a deadline, not show up, forget a birthday, charge it, ignore the phone call, walk away from your job, your spouse, your kids, your life. You could. I’m not saying you should. Some of this sounds crazy, irresponsible, appalling. And that’s because…you may not want to.


Give yourself some space to envisage the options. Not because you’re going to actually divorce your spouse or quit your job. But because the presence of any circumstance does not cosmically demand that you keep doing what you've always done.


When we stop accepting a current situation as fact, freedom shows up. So you're married to him and you work there and you drive that and you always do this for her and help them with that. Noted. Bully for you. Next time he walks in the door or you get to your desk there or you're doing this again or helping with that, remind yourself that you are choosing it. No one can obligate you. You obligate yourself. You're never stuck. You choose to remain.


When you give yourself the option of not doing whatever it is you’re doing, you show up in a different way. If you are present in your relationships because you make the choice to be there while fully acknowledging that you don’t have to be there, you bring an energy and a love that simply cannot exist out of sheer commitment and duty.


Think choice. Think possibility. Think big